Life before you

Life before you

Some of the best parts of my teenage years were spent with a group of 5 guys. We were best buds since I was 13. They were the first people who liked me for me. They were my protectors from the bullies and my shoulders to cry on when I need one.We bonded like a family. We did everything together as brothers and sister. The only thing I didn't do with them was pee standing up. I was the only girl in the group. We were proof that males and females could be just friends.

Of course as we grew up they had girlfriends. We were still pals and continued to do the things we did as buddies. Then one by one my pals feel in love and married. Even though the women in their lives met me and knew of our familial bond something changed after the ring went on. Suddenly I was being excluded from things. I wasn't hanging with the group anymore because the group dynamic had changed. The women in their lives decided they could no longer have female friends. WTF?? My friends were forced to give up a lifelong friendship because of petty insecurity and the need to be territorial. 

I have never understood how you can say you love someone but still be suspicious of any relationships they may have had before you came along. Now I can understand if there's some ex girl/boyfriend still hanging around. That can be a red flag for a lot of reasons. But when your significant other is made to cut off platonic friends simply because there is the fear that something could potentially happen, that falls in the category of being just stupid. If it was going to happen it would have before you came along.

I guess since I've not been in love I can't understand this concept of I must have you completely to myself. I've been told it's a natural part of a relationship. But if you are secure in your relationship then you don't need constant reassurance that the person you're with cares about you above all others.